When I said I may be putting up things that aren’t related to Dramas, this is one of those posts (I did put a few pics from some dramas for a little tie in~).

I hope you enjoy it and I will definitely strive to fulfill my weekly to do’s! Feel free to let me know some of the things you wish you could have learnt or accepted when you were faced with those angst ridden days ^^ Hwaiting!

So, before we begin, let’s get a little personal. I have social anxiety and last year it got really bad. Sadly, anxiety is best friends with depression. Doing “simple” and “easy” things became very hard and even though I still struggle I am in a much better place. I feel that this is something I am going to have to cope with for a very long time and it won’t go away fully. Thankfully, through social media I know that I am not alone.

Now, this list is just a small one, simply to give you (and myself) some reminders that, when we are teenagers aren’t widely accepted in our minds (well they weren’t for me!).

In no particular order:

• Second Chances:
  • There is always going to be a second chance. Or a 3rd, 4th, 5th,
    6th… you get where I’m going, right? haha It’s up to you to strive and create that chance. Honestly, if something goes wrong, not because you hate it, but because it wasn’t right for you at the time, or other factors effected how it went for you, there will be another way for you to experience or do what you wanted. But you have to be active in getting what you want.
    • I studied at university for a year. I hated it. I wasn’t interested in the course and I just wasn’t happy. But I knew I wanted to experience university and learn. So I applied for a different university and course and here I am.

• Appreciate:
  • Appreciate the people you love and let them know as much as you can, because you never know what could happen that could take them away. Life can be so fleeting at times, that we simply forget to say something as simple as ‘I love you.’
    • This also applies to things around you: nature, pets, home, your favourite pen… not everything will always be with you.

• Pace:
  • Everyone has their own pace and being “behind” people that are the same age as you or in your same friendship group is nothing to be ashamed of.
    • I know the feeling of looking at your friend’s lives and seeing that they have progressed so much further than you or are achieving amazing things, while you just finished a tub of ice cream in one sitting and didn’t change out of your pj’s all day…
    • The trouble with today’s society and the schooling systems especially, is that we are judged based on our peers and not just in private, but openly. In front of others. Be it grades, appearance, family, we are judged. What we need to remember is that we are all different and being different is what matters. Who cares if you take a little longer to reach the same place as someone else? You got there, didn’t you? You worked hard and you got there. Be proud of that and if you aren’t there yet, you will be, “just keep swimming” as Dory would say~

• Judging: 
  • We all judge. That’s pretty much a fact of life. Sometimes it subconsciously because its practically ingrained in our being to do so. However, it is what we think after we have these thoughts which is what is important.
    • I truly try to make a conscious effort to chastise myself if I think something which I shouldn’t. Especially when I judge someone on their appearance. And I certainly never voice my negative opinions to them.
    • Be kind to others. Don’t criticise people based on such a shallow thing as appearance.

Everyone is beautiful, just not beautiful to everyone. 

• NO:
  • Saying ‘no’ is not a bad thing. It doesn’t make you a bad person. Unless of course, if some old lady asks you to help her with something heavy or if someone needs help opening a door. I  mean, saying no to going out, or doing something you don’t want to, especially if you aren’t feeling up to it. Again, I don’t mean things like exams or dentist appointments!
  • Far too often I feel obliged to say yes to things I don’t want to do, mainly because of the people who ask. I may enjoy myself, which is always pleasant, but there is always that point where your chest hurts because you don’t want to be there and you don’t want to fake every smile.

• Being Alone:
  • Taking time to be alone and relax your mind is perfectly normal. And I find it pretty healthy for my sanity. Of course we all need a balance otherwise we would go insane without some sort of human contact. However, that balance is up to the individual and your needs. I like to be alone quite a bit, and I would feel guilty for not making effort. But now I realise that this is the time that I need, otherwise my company would not be wanted. At all. haha ^^”

• Crying:
  • Crying is normal. If it wasn’t, when we get emotional our tear ducts wouldn’t expel water from our eyes (science kids… haha). And crying is okay around other people.Now, this is something I still have problems with. But, honestly crying in front of others doesn’t make you weak. And more often than not, they can help you with whatever is troubling you or find someone or something that can. Like ice cream.
    • Sometimes I find that watching a sad film, which I know I will cry at, is a good remedy for expelling all these emotions and can help me to collect myself back together and really think better without having the pressure of needing to cry in my mind.

• Help:
  • Asking for help does not make you weak.
    • I will say that sometimes, when you do ask for help, you may not get what you need right away. Which is why I think this one is so important and one I wish I would have accepted a lot earlier on in my life.
    • If you ask for help and it isn’t helpful, then you have already found that courage to ask, that it can be easier to progress and ask again. I know, from experience, that this is a hard thing to do, especially if you don’t think your problem warrants help as it isn’t as bad as other peoples.
      • Your problem effects you and it become this huge thing, to you. Your mind is everything, it is everywhere and you can barely ever escape it. A small problem can turn into a huge one, simply because our world are so small and inclusive. Don’t be ashamed or feel unworthy of having help for a problem which some people would think was not important.

• Anxiety:
  • This beast hurts. I don’t mean emotionally, which it does. I mean physically. It physically hurts. I wish I was told this and I wish I was taught more about it in schools. 1. to know symptoms and 2. to know ways in which people cope with it. And so I wouldn’t freak out every time I have pain in my legs, and pain in my side and having to pee all the time (no joke – this is a way anxiety can “express” itself). These symptoms of being anxious, when they started and even now, make me more anxious.
    • Anxiety is a vicious pain in the butt.

• YOU:
  • ARE NOT ALONE!
    • It may seem like it. But there will be someone willing to help you. If your family aren’t understanding or you don’t feel comfortable talking to them about your problems, then try your friends, teachers, your gp, helplines etc.
  • We may have to go searching, but there will be someone. And I know it’s a cliche, but there may be someone who cares about you more than you know. We get so caught up in our own heads that we don’t see the kindnesses that occur to us.

This is a long one and I probably don’t make much sense in places, but I thought this would be good for me as a place to come back to and get my brain to accept! But also, a little something that could potentially help or reaffirm some things that you are thinking.

I wish you all the best in whatever you are doing at the moment and thank you for reading~